I describe Bella as a ‘perfect middle child’. She goes with the flow, she adapts easily, change doesn’t bother her. She’s happy-go-lucky and as sweet as they come.
Because of this, when she does get upset, it throws our lives completely off it’s axis.
The one thing that she has never really handled well, is going to school. The preschool teachers had to peel her off me every day from September until Christmas break. Until she met some friends. Or a friend. She always has had just one or two good friends.
Kindergarten went well, and I’m not sure why. The 2 classes did a lot of stuff together, and she had the same teacher that her sister had, and she really liked him. Along with knowing a couple girls from preschool, she made 2 really good friends, who were both in the other class.
On the 1st day of grade one, she was put in a class with none of her besties. She knew a couple girls, but was not happy. She was the only kid crying that morning, standing against the brick wall, lined up waiting to go inside. My heart broke. Oh and her teacher was pregnant. So I knew she’d be leaving during the school year.
I did nothing.
I figured it would be good for Bella. This would force her to make new friends. And the teacher leaving at Christmas break would be okay – since Bella knew it was happening.
Now, it’s the end of January. She’s cried walking out the door almost every single day. The teacher even noticed she seemed ‘sensitive’ one day. Abby found Bella crying in the bathroom once. She’s had more sick days this month than in December, when we had the plague. She coughs, says she doesn’t want to go to school, my heart breaks, and I let her stay home.
Today, the tears turned to full blown sobs.
We sent her out the door. Forced our sweet girl to do something she really didn’t want to do. She hates school, and she’s only in grade one. I ask her why she hates school, and all she says is “it’s too long”, and she “just wants to stay home”.
So what do I do? I can request she be moved into the class with her besties from kindergarten. But what if I do that and she still hates it? Do I ask her if she wants to be moved and get her excited only to find out that they can’t make it happen? Do I not tell her, and have it happen, and then have her freak out that she doesn’t want to be on the other side of the school (she’s right across the hall from her big sister now and LOVES that). Do I let her come home for lunch to make the day seem less long?
Poor sweet Bella.
Oh, and to all the parents with babies that don’t sleep or with toddlers that won’t eat or pee on the toilet…that’s nothing. It gets WAY harder.